I HAD TO CUT THE DCTEEN RECORDIUNGS VUZ MY PHONE SEVERLY LAC..

I HAD TO CUT THE DCTEEN RECORDIUNGS VUZ MY PHONE SEVERLY LACKS FREAJING STORSGEVBUC OCCASIO

XXXI’m forlorned,

sawthesine I opened up my eyes and I’m forlorned. It’s not fair















For\____\ (#(
)) ifiveeverseenit





-#5



































DNEGEL.....oh....that’s it right there.
bag
LET US:u,me,weeny (but I look handsome)











SEE YOUR
HARK, who goes there, like tehe, you know all of my porn spots.

((-4)(un-flagrent and boring assertion of cuteness, and 4 more archibald Willis please keep shooting sideways

LOVE YOU BUT WHY DO YOU TRY
AND MATURE
YOUR
HEART
SO COLD.
SO FAST
LET THE MOMENT LAST ENJOY THE DRIP OF TIME DOWN THE VOID WHERE EVERYTHING INTERESECTS & BECOMES OPPOSITE.






EQUILUBRIUM.
OR JUST A
PLACE WHERE
YOUR SPINE FINALLY POPS AND CRACKS. AND RELAXES ON THE
CLOUD OF
FLOATING
WHILE LANDING SOMEWEHERE ELSE.
ON A MAT. ON A BED. IT DID’NT MATTER AS LONG AS THE INPACT WAS HARD BUT THE LANDING WAS SOFT. IF THAT MAKES ANY SENSE.
THAT BRINGS ME TO NUMBER 4. IS THERE A 4? I KNOW THE TITLE HAS A THREE IN IT BUT CAN THERE BE A FOUR?..
WTF AM I THINKING...
4)PRECURSERS OF WHAT AN ALIEN IS..
A MINDSET
THAT IS KEEN ENOUGH TO FEEL WITHIN THEMSELVES RECYCLED ENERGY BUT ENOUGH "ORIGINAL" SYRIUM
TO STAY GROOVY
EVERYDAY.
WHY WERE WE TALKING ABOUT ALIENS?
"YOU WERE THE ONE WHO BROUGHT IT-"
BEFORE E CAN FINISH HER SENTENCE ALVIN JUMPED IN THE MIDDLE
LIKE A VERBAL MUD PUDDLE. SPLASHING IN CONDENSATION ALVIN NEEDED TO GET SOMETHING OUT. ACID WAS NOT WHAT HE THOUGHT IT WOULD BE..
WHAT DID YOU THINK IT WOULD BE?
OH NO. ALVIN THOUGHT.
NOW I AM HAVING ARGUMENTS WITH MYSELF.
"OH YEAH," ALVIN WOUND UP AGAIN, "LIKE MOST THINGS THE ONLY THING THAT SEPARATE YOU FROM THEM IS REFLECTION OF LIGHT AND SCARCITY OF SUBJECT."
"YOU ARE KINDA TRIPPING ME OUT NOW ALVIN ARE YOU OK?"
"WHAT? YEAH?" I ANSWERED.
"CAN I GET YOU SOME WATER OR ANYTHING?"
"NAH. NO, REALLY, I'M GOOD.
I'M JUST... HIGH AS FUCKING HELL." I REMEMBER SAYING.
"YEAH... I KNOW." ELOISE SAID WORRIED.
I WAS TOO.
IN FACT, EVER SINCE A FEW MOMENTS AGO, THINGS HAVE STARTED TO GET REAL UNCOMFORTABLE TO ME. MY SPIRIT FELT STR@NGLED BY SOMETHING CLOSE IN MY LIFE. I KNEW WHAT IT WAS. I WAS TRYING WITH MY EVERYTHING TO KEEP THE THOUGHT OF MY BULLSHIT WEASLE IT'S WAY INTO THE FIRST TIME THAT I TRY ACID. I AM NOT MY CONDITION. I AM A MOTHERFUCKING KID GUY...BOY....
"HE CALLED YOU THAT TODAY YOU SICK FUCK. HE DID. OH MY GOD" MY VISION WAS LIKE A SMALL BUG ON THE TOP OF A BIO-DOME. DID SHE JUST SAY THESE WORDS?
NO? WAIT. IF SHE JUST SAID SOME CRAZY SHIT LIKE THAT MAYBE SHE ALREADY KNOWS!" I WAS LASSOING THE PRESENT MOMENT
FOR THE IDEAS OF THE FUTURE.I NEEDED TO COME CLEAN. IF SHE KNOWS ABOUT HIM. AND SHE HAS MADE CLEAR SHE KNOWS HER FATHER IS A PIG, JUST NOT, (UP UNTIL NOW) IN ANY WAY SEXUALLY IDENTIFIED WITH ME. IF ONLY SHE KNEW.
I LOOKED AT HER SAD/HAPPY LIKE A FATHER FIGURE WOULD, THEN I CAUGHT THE DISGUSTINGNESS OF THAT PRESENT MOMENT.
THE BABY HAIRS ON THE NAPE OF MY NECK
STOOD UP AT ATTENTION. MY BL00D BEGAN TO MELT INTO THE OUTSKIRTS OF MY SKIN.
MY THOUGHTS BOILED OVER.
"I AM SLEEPING WITH YOUR FATHER."
(BIG MIRROR BREAK)
TIME PAUSED, EVERYTHING PAUSED
EXCEPT FOR ALVIN BEING HANDED A HAMMER AND HE HAS TO SMASH THE LARGE MIRROR THAT WAS NOW AND ABRUPTLY PLACED IN FRONT OF HIM AND BETWEEN HER. I AM LITERALLY IN TEARS AS I STRIKE AND EXPLODE THE MERCURY COLORED SHARDS OF LIGHT WITH A MEDIUM SIZED, BLACK RUBBER, BRICK MASON MALLET.
"STILL CRYING I SAT DOWN. MY MIND THREW IT'S SITUATIONAL MALLET INTO KOI POND, AND E WILL NEVER KNOW WHAT JUST WENT ON IN THIS WEIRD LITTLE FUCKING BRAIN OF YOURS."
ALVIN COMPLETELY FORGET/DIDN'T REALIZE HE JUST
ACTUALLY SAID IT OUT LOUD. ABOUT BONING HER FUCKING FATHER. HE SAID THAT, I LITERALLY FUCKING SAID THAT AND I WISH I NEVER DID BUT COWARDS LIVE IN THE PAST AND STORIES AND PROPER NEWS HAS RESPONSIBILITY ATTACHED TO THEM.
"I CANT FUCKING BELIEVE YOU."
E SAID LOW. DONE. EMPTY. UNREGISTERED BUT UNDERSTOOD.
"I SHOULD KILL YOU." ELOISE HISSES LONG AND LOW AND HATEFUL.
ALVIN STARTS TO WELL UP IMMEDIATELY IN THE EYES LIKE SOMEONE TURNED THE WATER ON FULL BLAST IN A CLOGGED DORM ROOM SINK.
"I'M SORRY" THE WORDS RATTLE OUT OF HIS CHEST, VOICE DEEP IN TRUE REGRET. MOMENTS REGRET. THE SECONDS AFTER FATES TWISTED LIKE SICK FIRECRACKERS FUSES WRAPPED AROUND THE APPENDAGE OF YOUR CHOOSING. LIKE SAW ONLY WITH REAL LIFE TORTUOUS SITUATIONS. JUST AS DIRE JUST ALOT, ALOT,
ALOT, MORE DRAWN OUT, EXCEPT FOR FUCKING NOW AND Jesus Christ THERE I GO AGAIN MAKING THIS FUCKING MOMENT ABOUT ME AND NOT HER.
ELOISE LOOKS AT ALVIN HARD AS DAGGERS BEFORE WALKING FAST AND POWERFUL OUT OF THE GARDEN.
"I AM THE MOST SELFISH PERSON IN THIS FUCKING WORLD AND I DESERVE NOTHING GOOD TO HAPPEN TO ME." I SAID OUTLOUD TO SPITE MY EARS USING METHOD ACTING. I WANTED TO HURT. LIKE MOST PEOPLE,
WHEN YOU ARE ALL FUCKED UP IN THE HEAD INSTEAD OF CUTTING WITH A RAZOR BLADE
I DO IT IN DE-MOTIVATIONAL MANTRAS BECAUSE I'M WEIRD AND I JUST SO HAPPEN TO REALLY FUCKING MEAN THEM. I SWEAR, THE WIRES AREN'T TIED UP RIGHT UP THERE.
BECAUSE SOMEHOW KARMA STUCK IN MY BRAIN
BUT BEING A DECENT HUMAN, A FUCKING PERSON AT ALL, YEAH, YOU ARE A FUCKING ALIEN. YOU ARE A FUCKING SATAN. I HATE YOU AND WISH YOU WOULD DIE RIGHT NOW.
FLASHES OF E YELLING THESE UGLY THINGS FLASHED IN MY MIND LIKE AFTER EFFECTS. I LOVED HER. I FUCKING LOVED EVERY BIT OF HER, I MEANT EVERY FUCKING WORD THAT WAS SAID. THAT'S WHAT MADE IT SO HARD. ALVIN KNEW. THERE WAS NO EXPLANATION. WHY DIDN'T HE JUST STOP. IT WAS THE SEX. THE ANSWER HIT HIM JUST
AS SOON AS IT CAME. THE GROSS, SICK SHIT THAT I FOR SOME REASON OR ANOTHER OPTED FOR ALL OF THIS. TO GET PAID FOR USAGE OF MY BODY AND THE WORDS THAT COME WITH THAT AT THE END ALWAYS, WITHOUT FAIL MAKE IT FEEL TRANSACTIONAL. KEEPING SOME STRANGE BARRIER UP MADE OF AGGRESSIVE OPPORTUNITY. THAT'S ALL THESE OLDER GUYS ARE ANYWAYS. THE ONES THAT PLAY THE GAME WITH A LOADED DECK ARE EXACTLY THAT. CHEATERS AND PLAYERS AND EXACTLY WHAT STEVIE NICKS SANG ABOUT IN ALL THOSE SONGS. THAT'S A DIFFERENT KIND OF "LOADED" I CONCURRED AFTER A BRIEF MOMENT OF PRECAUTION.
I PRACTICALLY FELT EVERYTHING AROUND ME, INCLUDING THE NEARLY TORN HEART OF MY BELOVED ELOISE, AND THE SCALES IN MY MIND START TO GET SET OFF KILTER AGAIN, AND THE STILTS OF REALITY START TO TREMBLE LIKE THEIRS A DRüNK GUY WORKING THE CONTROLS AND MY BRAIN STARTS BOILING. AND THEN I KNEW WHAT I HAD TO DO. THE SUBCONSCIOUS OF ALL OF THE WEIRDOS IN AND OUTSIDE OF MY HEAD CAME TO SOME SILENT HABITUAL UNDERSTANDING AND A FINAL THOUGHT WAS BROUGHT FORTH FROM THE ENGINE OF A MIND ON LIFE ALTERING DRUGS AND LIFE ALTERING DECISIONS BOTH BEING INGESTED AND EXPERIENCED AT THE VERY SAME TIME.
I HAD TO KILL MARK MANGE.
WHAT WILL PEOPLE ON THE TEAM THINK? I THOUGHT TO MYSELF QUICKLY.
NO MATTER, THE FACT THAT HE IS DEAN OF THE FUCKING SCHOOL IS ARBITRARY. WELL, IT IS WHY I WAS IN ALL OF THIS SHIT ANYWAY. BUT REGARDLESS, LIFE JUST GOT REAL AND I AM USUALLY FRANTIC AS A TURKEY ON THANKSGIVING BUT AS OF RIGHT NOW I AM STILL AS A COTTAGE. TRIPPING NUTS. NO WAY IN HELL I WOULD ALLOW MYSELF TO FEEL ANY KIND OF JOY, ESPECIALLY AFTER WHAT JUST HAPPENED WITH E, BUT THE DRUGS HAD CONVINCING ARGUMENT IN THEIR ENJOYMENT.
PARENTS B that your furthest mate has even heard of
– IwouldhaveaproblempretendingIwasnotalreadyentroPied
– Igotaneppelepticshockinmysleep.ImeanIhavefocal seizures all the time.
– Quickfroyo
⏱

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